Bring Some Yoga into Your Sex Life
Wow! Yoga is so sensual. All of this body awareness and intentional movement.
What do you think? Can it improve our sex life and spice it all up a bit?
It sure can!
Oh how pleasurable they can be when used in bed. There is so much hedonistic indulgence in the Cobra Pose, Downward Facing Dog, Standing Forward Bend, Table Top, Bridge Pose, Fish Pose, Lotus Pose (Sitting or lying down with knees to your chest), Squatting, Upward-Facing Dog, Supine Spinal Twist. Even Eagle Pose (Lying down) can work. And Plough Pose is one of the best!
Each one of these yoga poses gives a different sensation, in a very sensational way!
Ecstasy is an altered state of consciousness characterised by greatly reduced external awareness and expanded interior mental and spiritual awareness which is frequently accompanied by hallucinations, emotional, intuitive and even physical euphoria.
This state of trance causes endorphins to rush through the body. It causes the mind to relax from stressful occupations. It creates a psychological distance between the everyday experience and the emotions, which creates space for intellectual perspective and emotional shifts.
And oh my god/ goddess it feels so amazing!!!
Care to try?
Ecstasy is created by changing the chemistry of the body rapidly. What we want is more, or less, oxygen or anything else in our brain. Quickly.
Breathing is one very yogic way to do this. Try some serious loving while doing Kapalabhati:
Inhale deeply through the nose, imagine that you have something stuck in your nostrils, and exhale forcefully to get it out. Repeat, gradually increasing the speed of your breath up to an even 2 or 3 exhalations per second. Concentrate on the exhalations but remember to release your abdomen after each exhalation so that fresh air can come back in.
After about 100 repetitions or more, take a deep inhalation and hold your breath for as long as you can before releasing and enjoying the explosive sensations.
Being upside-down is another way to bring more oxygen to your brain. Let your head hang off the bed while you make love. Or if you feel like something a bit more acrobatic today, give your partner love, kisses and conscious touch whilst you are in Shoulder Stand or Head Stand.
Like in all paths of yoga, what makes it spiritual or not, and even what makes it work or not, lies in our intention. Too often, people underestimate the power of intention. Our mental focus is the most important element to any experience, including sex.
Sex can be a meditation; in fact, it is probably one of the easiest ways to meditate. Our mind can be naturally obsessed with sex, so it is not hard to wholly focus on that one thing while doing it.
By focusing on breathing and finding a rhythm in our movements, we can change our mental focus and clear our mind of other thoughts. Using our thoughts, we can also create certain flows of energy.
If we choose to bring every facet of our being to whatever we are doing, if we don’t experience a separation between our actions self and our inner happenings, then anything we do can be done in a meditative stage. And make the action so much more awesome!
“Whatever thoughts are in their minds, they vanish completely with the onslaught of a passionate embrace. When a man and woman are all in oneness, thus clasped together, there is nothing in the whole world to surpass the superb joy of that moment.” — The Kama Sutra
While making love, close your eyes and focus on your own pleasure. Try to experience it all over your body. Absorb the experience through all of your senses with your skin, ears and your nose. The tastes. Totally indulge in your own pleasure.
Now open your eyes and give your full attention to your partner; their pleasure, their movements, their facial expressions, their skin and their hair touching yours, their breath, their warmth and sounds.
Keep switching between one and the other a few times for about a minute each.
After some time try to reach a state where you are equally focused on your self and your partner. A place where you experience both them and you. Somewhere where you are so together, so absorbed in each other, you breathe and move as one. Blissed out!
I find sex, in general, to be much more relaxing than relaxation. But I understand that it is not like this for everyone and that many people need to relax first before they can start feeling all sensual and sexual.
Creating the right atmosphere can help a lot. Baby sitter to start with?! Then of course music (Energetic or slow depending on what kind of lovemaking you fantasise) with candles, loving words and massage.
I love massage; it imbibes the spirit of giving and receiving. It’s a great way to show love, practice conscious touch and connect to each other.
Being still for a while before all of the action starts also works miracles in having both partners open and receptive to love. Being still can be as pleasurable as being engaged in movement.
Here is one more amazing suggestion about relaxation. Tightening the pelvic region shuts down the body’s capacity for full-bodied orgasmic pleasure. Encourage each other to keep breathing deeply and relax your bodies together, to open more to ecstatic connection and pleasure.
When something is sacred to us, we treat it carefully, with reverence, we give it our whole mindful attention. In Tantra, the body and our sexual energies are considered divine and are treated as a holy instrument for connecting to each other, to life, and to the One Interconnected Reality where we may find liberation, peace, power, confidence and love. By recognising sexuality as sacred, people tend to put more effort and creativity into their relationships and lovemaking.
Before you begin making love, sit on the bed, facing each other. Eye gaze and breathe deeply together. Eye gazing is easy – soften your eyes and look into your partner’s eyes without “doing anything”. The eyes are the windows to the soul.
The next time you are making love look deeply into your lover’s eyes. Stay immersed in them and focused. Experience the whole event from that perspective. Coordinate your breath with your partner’s breath. Come back to the breath if your attention lapses.
In the Tantric model, the sexual experience is seen as a dance with no beginning or end. There is no goal, only the present moment of exquisite union and immense pleasure of all things big and small.
Breathe, stretch and enjoy the extended pleasure of sensual partner yoga. It is a great way to put a big “O” into your orgasmic state, your Om and your yOga!
Rainbow Yoga Founder & Senior Trainer